The Bill Always Wins! Tom and Arnold Chronicles!

[Scene: Kitchen. Tom opens the electric bill and groans. Arnold is calmly eating cereal.]

Tom: Arnold, explain to me why our electric bills never go down — even though we’ve got LED lights, energy-saving appliances, and we built an actual wind farm and solar array in the backyard?

Arnold: Because, Tom… the more we save, the more we use. It’s called the rebound effect.

Tom: So you're telling me... I saved power just so I could afford to run the blender 3 times a day?

Arnold: And the gaming PC. And the heated toilet seat. And whatever you’ve got charging in every outlet like you’re launching a space mission.

Tom: So… saving energy makes me spend more energy? Arnold: Basically. Welcome to economics — where efficiency is just a gateway to excess.

Tom: Well, I’m switching back to candles.

Arnold: Until you burn down the router and can’t stream your cooking tutorials.

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